Traumatic events happen and are all too common, but resiliency is an inspiration and provides life-changing lessons about coping with the trauma. Traumas can include divorce, a tsunami, or a fire to name a few. Become resilient by breaking through our isolation, reach out, and involve ourselves with others. This creates a common purpose and together you can gain strength and picture a better future. Work at turning your upside-down world right side up. Process your experience and feelings, schedule your next tasks, and provide yourself with safe, secure, clean physical space to sort things out. Trauma can create a feeling that you will never feel normal again, so share your experiences to inspire yourself and other victims to envision brighter futures. Make a commitment that you’re in for the “long-term.” Learn how to work effectively to demand change and remember that both personal and community take time to recover. Traumatic events can be humiliating, whether they damage our bodies or psyches. To help recover your worthiness, reach out to others and share your experiences. Create projects related to the trauma as a way to benefit. “Art therapy” can be therapeutic and can be done through painting, writing, acting, singing, or dancing.
Take these lessons with you and use them, whether you’re a survivor of a interpersonal, sexual, or catastrophic trauma. “Don’t go it alone. Create order out of the chaos. Nurture hope. Commit for the longterm because recover takes time. Reclaim your dignity through helping others.” These are wise words regardless of the trauma experienced.
Every year we make New Year resolutions that typically do not work. On average, only about 8% of society is successful with keeping their resolutions. The New Year is a time to look back and take stock of what we want for the future, but it’s no wonder we don’t stick to our resolutions, when they’re nothing but a list of things we don’t like about our life and ourselves and want to change. Who can get motivated about changes when this shaming mentality leads to stress and worse outcomes? This is the opposite of how we should start every New Year, so begin now by starting with a new kind of list.
Start by making a list of all the times you were “awesome.” Read this list aloud every time you feel down, depressed, or less than confident. Remember times throughout the past year where you were brave, strong, courageous, powerful, when you challenged your fears, stood up for yourself, and was frightened but made it through. Now that you’re feeling great about yourself and your abilities, make the list that will invoke changes and propel you into the New Year. This list will be of your fears. To help you get started with your list of fears, think back to the past year and ask yourself what you were afraid of and what about that fear scares you, then ask yourself, what is the worst that could happen, if this fear is rational, what you can do to protect yourself, and how you can overcome this fear. Keep in mind that you have to confront these fears and understand how they held you back. You will have to admit to yourself that you were afraid, discover is that fear is rational and ways to overcome it, but to succeed, you need to be open to change, no matter how terrifying it may be
Friends can psychological hurt friends, which is what makes us wary of friendship. We have all been on the receiving and giving side of this hurtfulness. With this aside, friendship is crucial to having a meaningful, resilient life. You need friends to help you through the dark times when they occur. In order to achieve and maintain a healthy sense of yourself, you need to have 4 types of friends in your life. These friends will help keep you balanced, encourage you, challenge you, and inspire you.
The prophet is a friend who helps you realize who you are and what guides you to think, behave, and feel in a particular way. These friends make you look deep inside for what defines you. The cheerleader is the supportive, sympathetic, calming friend who helps you grow and challenge yourself. The harasser is a friend with a great sense of humor who helps us not take ourselves too seriously. These friends bring perspective on your flexibility to change and how you face challenges in your everyday life. The inspirational or spiritual friend is the person you can call upon who will allow you to be yourself without feeling embarrassed. Discover who these friends are in your life and be sure to allow them to help you create a better life.
What does it mean to live a good life? We all have been given this gift of life and we need to figure out how to best use it. There are many different views, which allow for many different perspectives. Here are some thoughts to help you achieve a life well lived. Changes do not have to be earth shattering to make a difference. You can be gentle and do small things to accomplish the same outcome. Get moving every day, both physically and mentally, with compassion for others, even though your knees may get scraped (literally or metaphorically). Treat each day as if it was the first day of your life. Give yourself permission to be kind, extend good will and kindness to everyone you meet and with no thought of reward. This will create a day you will never regret or forget. Embrace pain and sorrow and let these experiences help you on your journey through life.
Life is not about how fast you run or how high you jump, but instead about how you handle life’s ups and downs. Give your undivided attention to others and be generous about it. Since you only live once, do it right, so once is enough. Treat everyone you encounter with kindness and care and do not deceive or despise them. Discover the small things and always be in the moment. It’s not about how much we see or do in life, but the attention that we give what we’re doing. Make life less difficult for each other. Take time to breathe. Find peace by refusing to cause conflict with others, unless necessary to protect ourselves. Live life and commit to affection and human warmth. Live life with a purpose and dedicate yourself to helping others. Remember that you don’t have to be perfect, but live compassionately and mindful, seeking peace within.